I'm a dork with a tablet that is trying to summon the courage to share some doodles.
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i have a santa kink. i want you to dress up in a sexy santa suit and leave me expensive presents under the tree when im sleeping. leave afterwards
I’m not sexist but I can guarantee that this was written by a women…
"im not sexist im just going to assume this was written by a woman because it has something to do with wanting expensive gifts" moron
today at work a little girl and her dad came through my line and she picked up two things of altoids and she was like “daddy let’s get the same flavor! so when you’re in afghanistan i can eat mine and you can eat yours and we can be together!” and me and my cashier just stood there like DON’T CRY DON’T FUCKING CRY DON’T BE A BABY AND FUCKING CRY
and then they left and we fucking wailed like children